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part with me
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about me
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Alotta my pals say that I am pretty random, and i like to think out side of the box alot. Im pretty crazy but not in the straight jacket sorta way ya kno. I like to send letters to my friends cuz everyone likes to get real mail every once and a while. I also like to leave messages on answering machines. Those are a few joys in my life. Another joy in my life is my friends. They put happy into my life just being there. They are my favorite people and I would do anything for them. There are many other joys in my life such as my dog and writing. There are sum downs too but the good stuff makes up for it. Ya can't let the bad bring ya down too much bcuz then life gets a little harder everyday cuz its just bringin ya down. Movin on, Im kinda spastic and goofy and thats aways fun. I like to have fun and smile and have a good time. I'm never usually serious but sometimes I am when I write. Other than that, I usually am never serious cuz its just not me. It would just be weird. But hey I'm weird too and sponaneous so ya never know what to expect outta me I am just a firecracker that just never stops goin. Ya think the pop stops but no it keeps on goin. I can also be refered to as spark plug cuz i dunno i guess im sparky but okay. Thats about all the main stuff, you'll learn the rest in time.
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| this is your cue. smile. |
Have you ever just looked in the mirror...and saw yourself as when you were a child? Because as I was washing up before going out today, I casually glimpsed in the mirror as I was washin my hands...and I see myself. Yet not the me I've been used to seeing these days, but the face of when I was about four. It must have been the facial expression I had when I glanced...because I recognized it and was caught off-guard, as if I found a childhood picture of myself at four years old just randomly at someone's house. It was that weird. And I remember instances like this before...recognizing the child Jenny is still present, just grown up. I still have the same face and characteristics...but it's just different now. I mean the facial expressions remind me of pictures of me when I was little, because some are so distinct.
With a second glance, I saw the present me. The same eyes, nose, and lips...ears, skin, everything. It's just different now. So I guess that was why it was so startling to see that four year old head on my sixteen year old body. The facial expression I recognize...it was from a picture. I was sitting on the floor and it looks like I just got up from a nap. I look really out of it but awake and aware. I just seem kind of startled and wide eyed yet calm. It was like someone called my name while I was daydreaming and took a picture. It was a reoccuring face because I seemed to look like that when I was scared or nervous too. I started out really shy when I was little. I never really talked much besides when I would swear like a sailor. My ma always told me that when she would talk to me, I would just stare at her intently and listen...as if everything she said was so important. And I wasnt sarcastic then, either. So I really was interested. I find myself still like that besides I am not as shy anymore. And I talk now. But seeing that face, that face from the past...it just made me think. I started thinking about how I am that same little girl, only in a bigger body. Now I am a teenager, and I do look different. Then I started remembering my thoughts of that age...what I would look like as a teenager. Would I just be taller? I didnt understand the whole concept of growing yet. I always thought of it kind of like that one Rugrats episode. The all turn into 'grownups' in a dream and all it is is their baby heads on adult bodies. I didn't necessary think my baby head would be on an adult body but just that I would literally grow up. Just stretch. Nothing change bodywise besides getting taller and getting labeled an adult. It's like my my childhood wonders have been answered seeing this familiar face. I know I was always a thinker. But I just remember trying so hard to picture myself as a teenager or grownup and wishing to grow faster in hopes my sister would want to play more instead of pick on me. And now...I'm a teen. Now it's so easy to remember what I looked and acted like when I was little. But it's still so hard to picture the future.. Jenny at 9:29 PM
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