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part with me
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about me
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Alotta my pals say that I am pretty random, and i like to think out side of the box alot. Im pretty crazy but not in the straight jacket sorta way ya kno. I like to send letters to my friends cuz everyone likes to get real mail every once and a while. I also like to leave messages on answering machines. Those are a few joys in my life. Another joy in my life is my friends. They put happy into my life just being there. They are my favorite people and I would do anything for them. There are many other joys in my life such as my dog and writing. There are sum downs too but the good stuff makes up for it. Ya can't let the bad bring ya down too much bcuz then life gets a little harder everyday cuz its just bringin ya down. Movin on, Im kinda spastic and goofy and thats aways fun. I like to have fun and smile and have a good time. I'm never usually serious but sometimes I am when I write. Other than that, I usually am never serious cuz its just not me. It would just be weird. But hey I'm weird too and sponaneous so ya never know what to expect outta me I am just a firecracker that just never stops goin. Ya think the pop stops but no it keeps on goin. I can also be refered to as spark plug cuz i dunno i guess im sparky but okay. Thats about all the main stuff, you'll learn the rest in time.
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Guess who just got baaaaaack today? Jen, Jen, that girl is back in town, girl is back in town...Jen, Jen, that girl is back in toooooooooooow wowowownnnn =D Sorry...had the damn song stuck in my head all day...fit the mood =))))))))))))
So yes, after a week long of being kidnapped to the middle of 'sconsin, I'm back to my most favorite place to be...home. Nothing feels better than this. Well, the welcome does...which is never really expected..but really appreciated this time around...the welcome really makes home feel like home and I feel it, oh yes I do. Well, with hopes of having a week to collect my thoughts and get a nice lovely tan, swim the day away, and indulge joyously in smores, fireworks, and let alone...FIRE (mind my pyro-ness...), I was limited due to shitty weather. Well hot damn...mood killer... With the simplicity of this week, the little events are complicated and very well detailed to be understood (I was with old folks all week, what the hell do ya expect lols). So it'll be listed and then go into detail. Saturday: Leave early, arrive at noon. Gloomy there, not promising. Test out my new fishy pole, nice. I settle in enough to my comfort (I never unpack, it's not my home. So this meaning, I just made my bed) I went as far as putting my stuffed animals on the bed, I need them. Thats the closest thing to home I have on me. I had them for years now, I dont leave them. Dont make fun, they are really important to me. Listen to music as I slaved myself on making my moms gift (not actually slaving when I want to do it, I just didnt let myself do anything else). Worked on it till late night, went to bed in morning hours... Sunday: ...Woke up few hours later to make her breakfast WILLINGLY despite my lack of sleep the past few days with her gift (and she doubts how much I care about her at times...what is she thinking???) Yea, my ma sometimes gets insecure about how much I care about her saying that I care more for my friends...thats why its so important to me that I MAKE her a gift. I show how much I care with my creativity, time, and effort. She doesnt have to know how long I worked on her gift but i'll tell you, 3 whole days and well into the nights..twisting colored tissue papers to make her a field of wild flowers and a sky of them as well(my artistic dream). And some of the flower petals shed from the sky flowers to trace in the field "I love you". My own personal quote was written in the sky, I searched high and low for cotton ball clouds and almost settled for the cotton i pulled off q-tips until i finally found real cotton balls...I really went all out for her. She may not know how long it took to make but she knows the little details on how it all came about and what it all means. She cried...but good tears. And suddenly, all that work...the back pain, the designing, creating, late nights and no sleep...it all didnt matter. My mom got a glimpse of how much she means to me, she got a glimpse into my heart through my vision of beauty and meaning of nature...it really meant alot knowing that. She loved her breakfast, she loved the fireworks around the lake, she really enjoyed herself. And that makes me happy. After fireworks that night, went fishin and caught a nice bass. It was crazy..thought of WArd and his enjoyment of fishing...named the fish ward the Crazy Bass. I let it go. Monday: Day off? Sleep in? No! It's like freakin Camp Cabin there...I was woken up early. My uncle needed a fishing partner and since no one else up there really fishes, I am that person. Not that it;s an obligation; whether I fished or not, my gramma knew I wouldnt stand for him fishing alone. I leaped to the opprotunity, he is the closest thing to my grampa being his brother...so if hangin out with him isnt neat enough, I feel that much closer to my grampa with him (Rest In Peace my friend). So I fished with him all day. I was catchin a good amount of fish. Bluegill are assholes so when I caught a nice size one, I kept it. Hell, it ate my damn worm. Tuesday: Cant sleep. Odd insomnia...either can't sleep at all or I can't sleep half the night...either way...when im woken up for my daily activities, hell. Don't talk to me...I only bite in the morning dammit...leave me the hell alone till I shower, get dressed, and eat in peace. I dont like breakfast..thats why i wake at noon...dont shove brunch in my face, no cold bacon...I'll have my cornpops, chocomilk, and fruit. Lemme lone...life will be better that way...specially if your the one who woke me up...stray away ye awakener of the innocent slumber..er..? Yes, I nearly ate my family today. They just dont know the drill yet...nay to mornings dammit, NAYYY... Well...anyway..fished. Ran outta bait. Went to town (or as people who frequent wisconsin call it 'FIELD TRIP!! FIELD TRIP!!!!" YAY!! OUTSIDE WOrLD!!) to get bait...an excuse to get out of isolation (boonies). We went and got groceries too. There was this one weird grocery store...it had clothes in it too...wack wisconsin stores... Anyway, I was in need of a teeshirt refreshment. Thats right..need to add to the assortment. No luck in juniors, womens, or girls. Mens had funny tee's, million times too big tho (who says everything's bigger in Texas? Check out 'sconsin dude..Texas has got some competition I believe...) Last hope, little boys. I can always count on nifty shirts in little boys, they just have neat stuff on them. Best part, the shirts fit me great =) Yay! I win! I find a pacman shirt and another shirt thats black and says "It wasnt me...it was my evil twin!" Yep, that's a Jen shirt. Funny cuz I dont have any twins or anyone who really looks like me for that matter so all in all, it ends up being me. And ya know, thats normal. Thats why it's funny. ITs me and my multiple personalities yo! Well yea, course...my ma doesnt believe they'll fit me just cuz they are little boys. Like I said, not only are little boys shirts way cool, but they fit me great! REally..I know my size..Meh..the nazi ma didnt believe me. So i go and try it on. I got the shirt on fine, it fits perfectly...and i go to open the door and its stuck. Now this is one of those dressing rooms with the tall doors that meet the floor and way above my vertically challenged little height so i was literally caged in there... So i push on the door and im like "Ma...im stuck.." and shes like "Unlock the door dumass" and im say "I never locked it!!" and she is like okay just stay calm...turn the knob and push hard." And i do...and the door doesnt budge...so she tells me not to touch the knob...she tried it and pulls the knob...no use either. She thought maybe there was a code ya would have to punch in to get out or in to prevent shop lifting so she wouldnt let me go captain insano in there and just push with all my might anymore for fear alarms will go off. Then she gets the manager... thinking she'll just punch a code and ill be out...no...the manager has to add on to the fun saying "I dunno? this never happened before." This of course gives me AMPLE amount of hope of ever getting out of that caustraphobic hell with terrible ventilation... So she rambles how this never happened before and im clawing at the little slots on the door politely yelling, "For Christ's sake! Itdid now!! Get me out dude!!" and totally trying to plan in my head how the hell they will get food to me over that 7 foot door if i were to remain in there for hours. Finally, she just allows me to push with all my might and i do...and i totally like ram that door and it flies open and there i am with this like scared deer look on my face with my little teeshirt on that says "it wasnt me....it was my evil twin". Nice.... All I had to say was "Well...it fits..." and then out of frusterated sarcasm that had to be said...I told the manager that luckily I grew out of swelling when i am nervous...or else i woulda never gotten outta that tshirt..." Grrr have dressing room doors that work dammit...huff and puff... Anyway, got back. Fished more. I caught a 16 inch 2 pound bass. I kept that, big enough and he ate my worm. Pleased the family with another possible meal. Went night fishing again, didnt many keepers. Uncle caught a 26 inch 4 pound Muskie (record breaking for our little lake). I helped him gather that son of a beast so it wouldnt get away. He kept it. Hot damn that was a monster! The teeth...flippin sharp! The fucker almost bit me as I was trying to get the hook out! Its some scary shit handling somehting like that on a narrow pier at NIGHT. It was a freakin beast dude...wow. We both had are bragging rights..marveled the rest of the night. I ate 4 smore to celebrate...bad idea Wednesday: Couldnt sleep...terrible tummy ache. There was like a flippin war going on in my estomago..with a 'bang bangs' and a 'boom booms'..raging hell! I went to the bathroom and I dont remember anything from there besides waking up in my bed with a burning feeling in my throat and a wash cloth on my head. I was like a rag doll...totally lifeless for most the day. I was so cold and limp...I felt worse than shit dude...damn. I dont know what came over me, gramma says it was those smores. It saddened me...how could something that brings me so much simple brilliant joy...suddenly betray me and make my body suffer so? It will be a while before I can forgive thy smore...Im too afraid to eat one again for now. I didnt want any food that day, but the ma and gramma shoved mac and cheese in my mouth...I need food in my tummy they say...well hell..i sat, it only comes right back. Evil edibles... Thursday: Gramma set out to clean the fish. I've seen it before with my grampa, I know how to do it. The only part i cant take...the part that makes me just want to let the fish free...is the part where you have to kill it. Well yea...I know ya gotta kill it sometime...but to have to do it yourself or watch someone, let alone know it's happening...ahh it freakin tears me up inside. Grr I try to be strong, but cheese and rice...I always have to leave the room when she kills it. After that, i'm relatively fine. I mean, theres no going back now...so I see the rest. Just that part...I cry each time. It may be just a fish but dude, it's a live thing...just like us...and killing it...well to me it's like killing a person. I just cant see something living and then watch it stop. I can never handle it. (I guess it was for my own good I wasnt there when grampa died...I wouldnt have been able to handle it...never never never...and I woulda felt just as bad leaving the room...) I seasoned the fish, cooked it for my ma and gramma. Sterilized everything for my dad and made it a healthy environment for him to eat as well (he's allergic to fish). I am very sensitive to his allergies to things so I got his back. Dinner was fulfilling to them...still couldnt stop thinkin bout the fish...I felt so bad...but as they say stronger species... I dont know...After being there for a while...I just came to think how much meat i eat anymore. I dont really eat much. I only have it for dinner. Strictly meat, potato, vegetable family. But really I dont eat it as much otherwise. I dont seem to enjoy it as much as I used to. I cant really say I could take a hearty bite of steaj and be like "Mmm now thats beefy good right there...THATS THE MONEY!" Nah..steak is just...steak. Beef...beef...chicken...goodness chicken even lets me down. And fish just makes me too guilty to eat. Im not really hungry anymore. Icecream...thats not exactly a meal...I mostly eat fruits and nuts now...Eww...Im turning all natural and nuts and berries...I even eat seeds! Christ Almighty...what have I become? Some kind of bird?!?!?! AHHHHHHH!!!! All i had this week were mainly PB sammiches, strawberries, cherries, watermelon, plums, sunflower seeds, milk. Then dinner o' course... I've turned bird? More reason for me to stick out in this big eating family...bird? I used to eat bird dude...whats wrong with me? Damn fish make me guilty about all animals... and I dont eat lunchmeat cuz the chemicals kill braincells...like I need to lose anymore... Edibles...ye let me down. Friday: Dashboard Confessional DVD...Chris Caraba ::licks lips while orgasming at his thought...:: Mmmm... Ice Age, Nemo, Zoolander, School of Rock...movie day. TV with family (blast that thing...stealing conversations (took me like 9 times to spell that word...)) 20/20...very interesting. Segment on "King" Arthur...I want to read up on that. Cell phone segment, disappointing. There is more bullshit to put up with...you need more that 15 minutes to talk about it. If you have the power to reach a nation, for goodness sakes...USE IT. You can get a word out better than any of us normal folk. Use your television powers to aid society, not to just amuse us. I mean, thank you for stating the damn obvious about cell phones and their bogus plans...i really learned a ton more watch you repeat common knowledge. Yes, we are being ripped off. No shit. What's the best plan? Why not test more than one cell phone plan? Shame...I wanted to learn something. Authur was really neat tho, history like that interests me. I want to see that movie, looks very awesome. Not sugar coated with knights and shining armor..round table..castle bs...no. This was before that. This was way more hard core. Authur was recognized for his fighting skills. He earned his reputation by bringing England together. Sure, by a massive war and killing lots of people, but he was brave and fought for peace within england. More or less..almost 5AM...facts may not be completely written correctly...look it up. Worth your while. Saturday: Now its finally sunny. I attempt to sun for a half hour. Go all out with deep tanning concoction. Try it out...really sticky...jump in the lake...nippy...dress...went home. Smiled. Surprise visit from a friend I havent seen for a while...WONDERFUL surprise...OMG it was lovely. I was just sitting here..in my travel grunge clothes...and my daad says a friend it here. I so want to run and change but curiosity on who it may be is totally killing me. So I go to see who it is and its my great friend Rach! Yayaya! Wow that was great, I missed hangin with her and the crew. Remenissed (sp...late..early...dammit...) about our summers..then went back to her house and had enchiladas? What the hell? I dunno what the hell I ate. It was good...out of my wisconsin diet tho (brats, onions, corn on the cob, cheese lols). Saw AnchorMan...plan to see it again... Despite Brick's mental retardation, him and I have a lot in common. We could be swell friends. If you saw that movie and you know me...yea...mmhmmm More stories...nearly blew up my hand...gramma said 'dick repelant' instead of 'tick repelant' and went on like nothing happened...(of course I laughed my ass off) Made an effort to use 'dick repelant' in my normal conversations with them cuz I can...(gramma said it...im just quoting hahaha) Made more tree friends up there this week...no ticks...waterbugs sure like the scent of coconut tho...beware... My week...hell of a long one...and now it's like 5AM literally. So I guess it's good morning loves' =) Jenny at 2:50 AM
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