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part with me
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about me
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Alotta my pals say that I am pretty random, and i like to think out side of the box alot. Im pretty crazy but not in the straight jacket sorta way ya kno. I like to send letters to my friends cuz everyone likes to get real mail every once and a while. I also like to leave messages on answering machines. Those are a few joys in my life. Another joy in my life is my friends. They put happy into my life just being there. They are my favorite people and I would do anything for them. There are many other joys in my life such as my dog and writing. There are sum downs too but the good stuff makes up for it. Ya can't let the bad bring ya down too much bcuz then life gets a little harder everyday cuz its just bringin ya down. Movin on, Im kinda spastic and goofy and thats aways fun. I like to have fun and smile and have a good time. I'm never usually serious but sometimes I am when I write. Other than that, I usually am never serious cuz its just not me. It would just be weird. But hey I'm weird too and sponaneous so ya never know what to expect outta me I am just a firecracker that just never stops goin. Ya think the pop stops but no it keeps on goin. I can also be refered to as spark plug cuz i dunno i guess im sparky but okay. Thats about all the main stuff, you'll learn the rest in time.
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I just cant do it. I can't strictly write feelings on here. Sure...it was easy to type yesterday...but ever so hard to read today. It's hard to admit some feelings. Like loving and never knowing if you are loved back. Mike is one of my best friends and I have no idea if he even loves me as a friend back. And it hurts not to know...because I feel like I have my heart on my sleeves, and he is still just a mystery...leaving me wondering what he means by some of the things he says...are they riddles? Is he showing his affection in riddles? It's one of those things that you see it there...but then you are not sure...it's just so confusing...you are never sure. And I am one to need to hear it or else I just won't know. And I dont know...I prolly will never know. And i hate admitting that. So whatever. Moving on...
I had this dream this morning where I was going to the gyno for the first time (Mind you, Ive bever been to a gyno yet...Im still with pediatrition). And I was waiting in the room and I guess 2 of my friends (whom I dont really recognize) are there with me. Im kind of weirded out due to the circumstances but they wont leave. So it's a long wait till the doctor gets in and these 2 friends and I are just goofing off and running around. Then the doctor woman comes in and she seems friendly but holding this big fucking seringe in her hand. That of course scares the shit out of me and I start running around frantically (I HATE SHOTS). So the doc and two friends pin me down and stab me with the shot and it sucks my blood out. The doc apologizes saying that they need my blood sample since its my first time here. After the ouch goes away, I calm down and begin to forgive them for attacking me. Then the doc comes in again with another big ass shot and is like "Oh yea...we need this blood for other testing" and I'm like "Hell no!! You just fucking like to stab me with shots! Lemme lone dammit!" Course, they pin me down again and stab me, take all the blood that can fit in the seringe and then the doc leaves again. Now I'm getting exausted. That's the second time I've been wrestled down and a good amount of blood has been taken out of me. The next time the doc comes in, she has an even BIGGER SHOT and I still freak out but I'm a little slower now with the loss of good blood...and I end up fainting while saying "Fuck you, asshole..." After I faint, I wake up and the doc says everything is all done. I have no more bandaids than after I fainted so I was relieved (all boring bandaids, thats when you know your a grown-up..) So then I go downstairs to be picked up and I have this beautiful tall, dark, and handsome husband. He asks me if I had a male gyno and I say no...it was this nazi chick. It's night out so as Im waiting for him to unlock the doors to our minivan (WTF?), I see a shooting star. I get really excited and i run around the back of the minivan to give him a kiss (always wanted to do that to someone I love) and I run right into the back of the minivan. And we're laughing our asses off at this and I'm just like "Ugh...that only happened because alot of blood was taken out of me..." Then somehow, we are suddenly on a motorcycle in a parade and all our family is in the crowd. Now it's sunset time...and we were riding off into the sunset on this kick ass motorcycle while everyone is cheering (hmm..mystery man must be a keeper...) And that was my crazy ass dream. Weird...insanely weird...but amusing. I think I laughed in my sleep at me running into the back of the van...that image was so flippin funny...goodness I hit it so hard and just fell over. It was great! Hmm...shower...then play. Jenny at 1:47 PM
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