Her Smiling Eyes

Saturday, August 21, 2004

So Im kinda behind but then not really. I just get sidetracked by rockin days...and then I have to back track because...well hell its worth it lol.

Thursday started off early...I woke up and did some chores and other stuff. Then I showered. Carly and Manda came over around noon which was neat and we went for a stroll around the block. It was really nice because those two are just really awesome and talkin with them is great. Like I was tellin them about my new jeans (cuz thats all i got from school shopping so far...2 pairs of jeans..shit lol) and they said that the jeans look like any of my other jeans. Now im not very picky or fashiony...but the shade of indigo is different lols. These ones are darker...and i notice because my other one are lighter (and jeans is pretty much all i wear...but what else is there anyway? My dickies? They all have distinct colors.) And I really have to enjoy this petty stuff now because come school...theres gonna be tougher shit to handle (essays with a set due date, studying, bah)

It was really funny though because the subject changed to something else (dont recall what right now) and then Carly says "And also, the thing about jeans is that..." and I started laughing because she was still thinkin about jeans. And I love those times...you just laugh. It may be something really stupid or not necessarily funny...but then it is...it really is lol. Its nice to laugh like that with your friends. Life is just funny.

Luckily, I had my camera with me and I was able to capture some of these moments. It was just wonderful. Nice sunny day, a stroll with two great pals...and laughter. The pictures make me smile because they really do show the moment and the happy mood and such. I have one of each of them in mid-laugh, and I like those pictures. I always try to get people in mid-laugh because that it such a great moment. When you laugh, it's just letting go...letting go of everything because the action is so spontaneous...and when it happens..it controls you for however long you thinks its funny. And to capture that, someone just letting go of everything and laughing whole heartedly...its amazing. I love that especially when Im stressed. I almost feel...free

Anyway, we get back to my house and keep trying to figure out my camera lol. I keep forgetting how to make movies on it, and I still dunno how to make timed shots. Bah...I'll learn soon enough. Oh and while we were walkin, John Deere tried to pick me up cuz I thought he was sayin hello but he was speakin old man jibberish. Mumble mumble mumble...im gonna have to get used to saying "What??" since he's my bus driver and all...GOSH. He was askin if I was a sophmore and routinely, I said yea. But then quickly corrected myself when he told me to get on the bus. Then I was like WAIT? No no no Im a junior.

Yea...I prolly messed up his senial mind. My ma said that I am prolly gonna cause him to take double his old people pills. Sheesh...way to make me feel bad lol. And I really did because old people really freak me out. I mean they are so unpredictable. A few days, John Deere wasnt driving..and I thought he passed away. I was so upset that once I even asked the temp bus driver where Johnny was...but he was just off. Phew. Same thing with my lunch lady, Mrs. Pat. She was gone a week or so and I thought she realy sick or passed away. I'm always afraid old people are just gonna pass away. Just randomly...when you least expect it. I shouldnt think like that...it's sad. I wish people didnt have to get that old and frail.

Hmmm...I'll talk about it later...

After they left, I called Mike. Sigh. I went and picked him up and he kinda forgot to tell me his street was freakin under construction...dumbass... But he said the trucks and shit came like a minute after we got off the phone. Surrrrre. I drove really well there and even with him in the car, really well on the way back. Before he got in the car, he saw the dent on the front fender and whispered to me "Was that from you?" and he says it knowing the answer...he just likes to see me get embaressed...jerkass lols.

And thats the thing about him and I, we are like one person. A brain, mind, thought process, in two bodies. It's pretty cool, but when you guys share thoughts too many times in one day...it gets really really creepy. So many times that day we have told each other "Dude, I was just thinking that" for like an idea or a comeback, even comments. "I knew you were gonna say that" was stated alot too. It's amazing...I never really had that big of a connection with someone before (besides Carly and I cycling in sync...weird..) Well, I had understood and was understood best by my grampa...we had a lot in common and I guess a connection? But Mike and I...I never thought I could share something like that with someone. It's really special to me I mean...we have our own code...we dont even have to speak and we know. We just click, ya know? All around.

So we got to my house, and then went on a walk. We walked to our friend Grace's house to play pool. We read each others minds the whole way there with thoughts on fireworks and blowing stuff up. And other stuff. Grace had to get her pictures done, damn picture day...everyone is getting pictures today...what about the abidigitals? Soul stealers! Haha lol. We got back to my house around 4. Then we watched Little Nicky and School of Rock all while having an on going pillow fight.

We are quite the dorks making a rumble match outta pillow fighting lol. But that's just how we are. We always kicked each other in the shins, and it was kinda nice to continue on with that. The pillow brawl was highly amusing because not only were we trying to hit each other with them, but we were trying to steal each others pillow. So I went all Matrix on his ass and would do all these random rolls and nail him in the shins and then pop back up and hit him with a pillow.

And one of the things I miss the most, the wrestling. Nobody will wrestle me. I mean, Im no pro wrestler or anything...but its a hell of a lot of fun. Just trying to pin each other and its just priceless. Everyone is too afraid to get dirty or hurt or something...I dont know...people just dont have the guts to wrestle. You dont have to think too much into it...just tackle me and try to pin me down. Yea...try lol...because its trip dude. Pin me...I DARE YOU lols Come on..its fun =)

Yea and he says that over the year, he's become a lot calmer and I've become a lot more hyper. He was like "instead of you seeming calmer...your more hyper...and besides my normal hyper, I've grown a little calmer..." all while we are tackling each other...rrrrriiight.

We were eating hot dogs for dinner (easy meal for me lols) and there was an extra so we went to go get it. As we were coming back down, he was walking into the family room and I go to kick him in the ass. Yet instinctively, he dodges it but ends up tripping on the edge of the carpeting and sommersaults forward and rolls...ALL WHILE STILL HOLDING HIS HOTDOG...it was AMAZING! It didnt touch the ground one. I had to give a little golf clap for that one while we both cracked up.

And I forgot how much I enjoyed that...us laughing at each other's clumsy mishaps. We'd always trip each other and laugh. I miss that. Another thing I missed and will still miss is the way we hung out. We hung out a lot in school and sometimes out, and it's always just so natural. There is no trying to impress each other...we are just there. He would always give me that extra little attention that I needed to feel special and great. He could always make me feel noticed.

And I miss the way he smells...he smells so good. Everytime I see him, it's like he puts on cologne just for me. It's so potent...not like over powering...but noticable. Like he'll brush against me..and I'd smell his yummyness. And I love it...it smells like guy. I mean it smells good...and it smells like a guy. It smells like Mike.

Another reason I dig him so much is that he has guts. He is extreme and crazy like that. We both jump off moving vehicals...he car surfs (the fastest hes gone was like 50mph car surfing), he likes extreme sports like biking, skating, snowboarding, he's just gutsy. And that's a real turn on for me, I like living life on the edge...living like there is no tomorrow...just living. I love the rush. With just his presence, he gives me that rush of just wow, excitement. He's just...masculine in all the right ways. He plays sports (brownie points), mainly soccer. He's just...full of tricks. And he likes the same types of music i like...we like a bunch of the same bands. He's just...Mike...moshing Mike, crowd/car surfing Mike...silly tribal wrestling Mike...so damn...likeable...so compatible. There is just this undying, irresistable attraction to him...I just cant let go.

I love how comfortable we are around each other. I mean, I can talk to him about things I would be too afraid to confess to other crushes. I mean, it helps that we are best pals cuz then its not so hard to be like "Chyea...you are hot...I can admit that...but dont get all fucking big headed..and watch out for the shallow chicks that only go for looks." That came from me after we were reminising about how we used to be back in the day when we first met.

He was like I was a little runt with buck teeth and short hair. I was a crazy idiot then. Now...people actually think im hot. I mean dude, someone told me the other day and I was just like "oh..okay.." I was a runt with buck teeth... And being the ass I am, I was like "And now?" The response baffled me. I mean sure, we know each other pretty well inside and out...we usually know what to expect as a comment back. Some reason, I thought of every other guy and their typical response easily being "Well..now im hot..duhh". But instead, Mike was like "Well..now I have braces...no more bucky jokes.." And I liked that answer a lot better. Shows he doesnt totally focus on his image...mostly his imperfections (like the teeth).

And as I stated before, there are always more reasons to love him. He's clean too, no smoking or drinking. WAy to win my heart...

We went to Butera at 8 to hang out with Jules on her break. Poor kid...shes always working it seems =( Thats why i visit her..but mostly cuz i miss her. Mike and I got a bag of starburst to share. Julia got some fried chicken. We ate outside and talked. While we waited for Jules, I poked Mike with so many random objects..it was great. The list consists of: ballerina wine bottle opener, hershey syrup, ground beef, sardines, tongs, starburst bag (actually I whacked him with it), box of cake mix...and thats about it. Yes...I rock lols.

Then we went back to my house while tripping each other and pushing lol. I tried to teach him some things on guitar. Finding out he sucked...he untuned it...and put my pick INSIDE the guitar so I wouldnt lose it. WTF? Yes, these are some reasons why i beat him up lol. Ughhh....fucker... Then he tried to play my guitar violin style with a letter opener...and play me a song..which was cute..but my strings! AHHH the little parent voice in my head was screaming "DONT TOUCH THAT...DONT DO THAT...DUDe...TIME OUT FOR YOU..TIME THE FUCK OUT" but i was more amused watching him and taking pictures. He hates gettng his picture taken so ya know...makes me wanna do it more. Specially with him UNTUNING MY GUITAR...UGH..."If you untune it...maybe you will sound better" lols

I burnt him a few CD's and we listened to them while picture fighting. I got some good ones...I win.

Despite him UNTUNING MY GUITAR...I still have feelings for him...really big feelings...and he still makes me smile so easily. Hmph..I went to hold the door open when we got home, and I was like you can go dude...and he was just like no, ladies first. Yes, just tear my heart from my chest and put it on your mantel...just for keeps...he keeps winning me over...I dont know what it is with him...but he keeps making me fall in love over and over...its like 50 first dates... =/

He stayed till like 10:30-11...it was nice. And freakishly enough, while we were wrestling one time...I was holding onto his arm trying to pull him down and he flippin lifted me up a good 2 inches off the ground...ONE ARM. MY GOSH!

It was a very fun time with him, and its really sad because thats prolly my last time seeing him till Christmas Break or February. Hopefully he moves back soon. I miss him so much. ANd I realized how much I actually miss him Thursday...all the little attributes that go along with Mike...hmm...

I love...

Jenny at 12:40 AM

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her smiling eyes
this is your cue. smile.
Saturday, August 21, 2004 So Im kinda behind but then not really. I just get sidetracked by rockin days...and then I have to back track because...well hell its worth it lol. Thursday started off early...I woke up and did some chores and other stuff. Then I showered. Carly and Manda came over around noon which was neat and we went for a stroll around the block. It was really nice because those two are just really awesome and talkin with them is great. Like I was tellin them about my new jeans (cuz thats all i got from school shopping so far...2 pairs of jeans..shit lol) and they said that the jeans look like any of my other jeans. Now im not very picky or fashiony...but the shade of indigo is different lols. These ones are darker...and i notice because my other one are lighter (and jeans is pretty much all i wear...but what else is there anyway? My dickies? They all have distinct colors.) And I really have to enjoy this petty stuff now because come school...theres gonna be tougher shit to handle (essays with a set due date, studying, bah) It was really funny though because the subject changed to something else (dont recall what right now) and then Carly says "And also, the thing about jeans is that..." and I started laughing because she was still thinkin about jeans. And I love those times...you just laugh. It may be something really stupid or not necessarily funny...but then it is...it really is lol. Its nice to laugh like that with your friends. Life is just funny. Luckily, I had my camera with me and I was able to capture some of these moments. It was just wonderful. Nice sunny day, a stroll with two great pals...and laughter. The pictures make me smile because they really do show the moment and the happy mood and such. I have one of each of them in mid-laugh, and I like those pictures. I always try to get people in mid-laugh because that it such a great moment. When you laugh, it's just letting go...letting go of everything because the action is so spontaneous...and when it happens..it controls you for however long you thinks its funny. And to capture that, someone just letting go of everything and laughing whole heartedly...its amazing. I love that especially when Im stressed. I almost feel...free Anyway, we get back to my house and keep trying to figure out my camera lol. I keep forgetting how to make movies on it, and I still dunno how to make timed shots. Bah...I'll learn soon enough. Oh and while we were walkin, John Deere tried to pick me up cuz I thought he was sayin hello but he was speakin old man jibberish. Mumble mumble mumble...im gonna have to get used to saying "What??" since he's my bus driver and all...GOSH. He was askin if I was a sophmore and routinely, I said yea. But then quickly corrected myself when he told me to get on the bus. Then I was like WAIT? No no no Im a junior. Yea...I prolly messed up his senial mind. My ma said that I am prolly gonna cause him to take double his old people pills. Sheesh...way to make me feel bad lol. And I really did because old people really freak me out. I mean they are so unpredictable. A few days, John Deere wasnt driving..and I thought he passed away. I was so upset that once I even asked the temp bus driver where Johnny was...but he was just off. Phew. Same thing with my lunch lady, Mrs. Pat. She was gone a week or so and I thought she realy sick or passed away. I'm always afraid old people are just gonna pass away. Just randomly...when you least expect it. I shouldnt think like that...it's sad. I wish people didnt have to get that old and frail. Hmmm...I'll talk about it later... After they left, I called Mike. Sigh. I went and picked him up and he kinda forgot to tell me his street was freakin under construction...dumbass... But he said the trucks and shit came like a minute after we got off the phone. Surrrrre. I drove really well there and even with him in the car, really well on the way back. Before he got in the car, he saw the dent on the front fender and whispered to me "Was that from you?" and he says it knowing the answer...he just likes to see me get embaressed...jerkass lols. And thats the thing about him and I, we are like one person. A brain, mind, thought process, in two bodies. It's pretty cool, but when you guys share thoughts too many times in one day...it gets really really creepy. So many times that day we have told each other "Dude, I was just thinking that" for like an idea or a comeback, even comments. "I knew you were gonna say that" was stated alot too. It's amazing...I never really had that big of a connection with someone before (besides Carly and I cycling in sync...weird..) Well, I had understood and was understood best by my grampa...we had a lot in common and I guess a connection? But Mike and I...I never thought I could share something like that with someone. It's really special to me I mean...we have our own code...we dont even have to speak and we know. We just click, ya know? All around. So we got to my house, and then went on a walk. We walked to our friend Grace's house to play pool. We read each others minds the whole way there with thoughts on fireworks and blowing stuff up. And other stuff. Grace had to get her pictures done, damn picture day...everyone is getting pictures today...what about the abidigitals? Soul stealers! Haha lol. We got back to my house around 4. Then we watched Little Nicky and School of Rock all while having an on going pillow fight. We are quite the dorks making a rumble match outta pillow fighting lol. But that's just how we are. We always kicked each other in the shins, and it was kinda nice to continue on with that. The pillow brawl was highly amusing because not only were we trying to hit each other with them, but we were trying to steal each others pillow. So I went all Matrix on his ass and would do all these random rolls and nail him in the shins and then pop back up and hit him with a pillow. And one of the things I miss the most, the wrestling. Nobody will wrestle me. I mean, Im no pro wrestler or anything...but its a hell of a lot of fun. Just trying to pin each other and its just priceless. Everyone is too afraid to get dirty or hurt or something...I dont know...people just dont have the guts to wrestle. You dont have to think too much into it...just tackle me and try to pin me down. Yea...try lol...because its trip dude. Pin me...I DARE YOU lols Come on..its fun =) Yea and he says that over the year, he's become a lot calmer and I've become a lot more hyper. He was like "instead of you seeming calmer...your more hyper...and besides my normal hyper, I've grown a little calmer..." all while we are tackling each other...rrrrriiight. We were eating hot dogs for dinner (easy meal for me lols) and there was an extra so we went to go get it. As we were coming back down, he was walking into the family room and I go to kick him in the ass. Yet instinctively, he dodges it but ends up tripping on the edge of the carpeting and sommersaults forward and rolls...ALL WHILE STILL HOLDING HIS HOTDOG...it was AMAZING! It didnt touch the ground one. I had to give a little golf clap for that one while we both cracked up. And I forgot how much I enjoyed that...us laughing at each other's clumsy mishaps. We'd always trip each other and laugh. I miss that. Another thing I missed and will still miss is the way we hung out. We hung out a lot in school and sometimes out, and it's always just so natural. There is no trying to impress each other...we are just there. He would always give me that extra little attention that I needed to feel special and great. He could always make me feel noticed. And I miss the way he smells...he smells so good. Everytime I see him, it's like he puts on cologne just for me. It's so potent...not like over powering...but noticable. Like he'll brush against me..and I'd smell his yummyness. And I love it...it smells like guy. I mean it smells good...and it smells like a guy. It smells like Mike. Another reason I dig him so much is that he has guts. He is extreme and crazy like that. We both jump off moving vehicals...he car surfs (the fastest hes gone was like 50mph car surfing), he likes extreme sports like biking, skating, snowboarding, he's just gutsy. And that's a real turn on for me, I like living life on the edge...living like there is no tomorrow...just living. I love the rush. With just his presence, he gives me that rush of just wow, excitement. He's just...masculine in all the right ways. He plays sports (brownie points), mainly soccer. He's just...full of tricks. And he likes the same types of music i like...we like a bunch of the same bands. He's just...Mike...moshing Mike, crowd/car surfing Mike...silly tribal wrestling Mike...so damn...likeable...so compatible. There is just this undying, irresistable attraction to him...I just cant let go. I love how comfortable we are around each other. I mean, I can talk to him about things I would be too afraid to confess to other crushes. I mean, it helps that we are best pals cuz then its not so hard to be like "Chyea...you are hot...I can admit that...but dont get all fucking big headed..and watch out for the shallow chicks that only go for looks." That came from me after we were reminising about how we used to be back in the day when we first met. He was like I was a little runt with buck teeth and short hair. I was a crazy idiot then. Now...people actually think im hot. I mean dude, someone told me the other day and I was just like "oh..okay.." I was a runt with buck teeth... And being the ass I am, I was like "And now?" The response baffled me. I mean sure, we know each other pretty well inside and out...we usually know what to expect as a comment back. Some reason, I thought of every other guy and their typical response easily being "Well..now im hot..duhh". But instead, Mike was like "Well..now I have braces...no more bucky jokes.." And I liked that answer a lot better. Shows he doesnt totally focus on his image...mostly his imperfections (like the teeth). And as I stated before, there are always more reasons to love him. He's clean too, no smoking or drinking. WAy to win my heart... We went to Butera at 8 to hang out with Jules on her break. Poor kid...shes always working it seems =( Thats why i visit her..but mostly cuz i miss her. Mike and I got a bag of starburst to share. Julia got some fried chicken. We ate outside and talked. While we waited for Jules, I poked Mike with so many random objects..it was great. The list consists of: ballerina wine bottle opener, hershey syrup, ground beef, sardines, tongs, starburst bag (actually I whacked him with it), box of cake mix...and thats about it. Yes...I rock lols. Then we went back to my house while tripping each other and pushing lol. I tried to teach him some things on guitar. Finding out he sucked...he untuned it...and put my pick INSIDE the guitar so I wouldnt lose it. WTF? Yes, these are some reasons why i beat him up lol. Ughhh....fucker... Then he tried to play my guitar violin style with a letter opener...and play me a song..which was cute..but my strings! AHHH the little parent voice in my head was screaming "DONT TOUCH THAT...DONT DO THAT...DUDe...TIME OUT FOR YOU..TIME THE FUCK OUT" but i was more amused watching him and taking pictures. He hates gettng his picture taken so ya know...makes me wanna do it more. Specially with him UNTUNING MY GUITAR...UGH..."If you untune it...maybe you will sound better" lols I burnt him a few CD's and we listened to them while picture fighting. I got some good ones...I win. Despite him UNTUNING MY GUITAR...I still have feelings for him...really big feelings...and he still makes me smile so easily. Hmph..I went to hold the door open when we got home, and I was like you can go dude...and he was just like no, ladies first. Yes, just tear my heart from my chest and put it on your mantel...just for keeps...he keeps winning me over...I dont know what it is with him...but he keeps making me fall in love over and over...its like 50 first dates... =/ He stayed till like 10:30-11...it was nice. And freakishly enough, while we were wrestling one time...I was holding onto his arm trying to pull him down and he flippin lifted me up a good 2 inches off the ground...ONE ARM. MY GOSH! It was a very fun time with him, and its really sad because thats prolly my last time seeing him till Christmas Break or February. Hopefully he moves back soon. I miss him so much. ANd I realized how much I actually miss him Thursday...all the little attributes that go along with Mike...hmm... I love... Jenny at 12:40 AM Comments: Post a Comment
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