Her Smiling Eyes

Saturday, September 11, 2004

Friday was a really really good day. I woke up happy and went to school happy. Which is weird because usually it takes getting on the bus to get happy. That meaning seeing Manda, to help motivate me to go to school lol. Yet this morning, I woke up happy.

I got to school and Matt gave me a rockin hug and his jersey. It was really big but what do you expect? There is usually padding and armor underneath (haha that made me think of knights). We talked for a while and laughed. I saw Courtney's hair and it's amazing lol. It made me think of Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite when he was saying the reason he was so hot was because of all his hair. So he decided to shave it off and it was just so random. And then Meg said that Courtney told her she didnt like her hair and Meg was like "want me to cut it?" and Courtney is just like YEA. And it all sounded just as random, it was great! Courtney is amazing, there are times i wish I had the guts she did. Haha she let us pet her hair lol. Yay! Then the bell rang and Matt gave me another hug and I was really happy =)

Earth Science, Stafford had us doing tedious shit. And you know, it wouldnt really matter in the end if we REALLY NEEDED TO DO IT. But of course, we didnt. He decided at the very end that all of what we did was useless and we will do something better on monday that works. FUCK. You know, I had to hold a funnel with a filter with VERY dense dirt in it, and slowly keep pouring water in it to see how long it take to get 200ml of water through 40 ml or so of dense as all hell dirt. And I had to HOLD the funnel as I watched the water drip through ever so slowly or else it might affect the outcome. So the funnel had to be above the water, and I was holding it for 31.27 minutes. I SPENT A HALF HOUR OF MY LIFE WATCHING WATER DRIP THROUGH A FUNNEL SLOWLY FOR NO APPEARANT REASON! Not that I wasnt interested in the outcome, just the fact that he had us do all that and then tell us it wasnt necessary. If he just kept that part to himself, maybe it wouldnt be that bad. I coulda went on believing it was for the sake of learning, not for no flippin reason. Dammit. Oh well.

Algebra I had a test. Funny, I was okay with that. I am usually spazzed out of my mind but I was in such a good mood, it was like a calming agent. I just had so many happy thoughts and feelings, it was like a shield to all the bad feelings and thoughts. I think I did alright on it. I really do understand it, the only problem is I cant explain how. So I hope I explained myself well enough. The teach likes that part. Ugh...theres a lot about me I cant explain. It just is. So when I figure out a problem or something, be content with that. Because I can't tell you what my mind does to get there or how it even starts. I dont really use my mind much, only my heart. So really...cant tell ya how this stuff comes about. I guess it's like the Big Bang, it's still a mystery.

Yearbook was interesting. Dont really remember much besides...nope...nothin in my noggin. That class just goes. Oh, we had to practice writing captions again. It was pretty self explanitory so i decided to mix it up with my creative writing skills. Good or bad, I dont know. Entertaining, good. Completely factual, not necessarily lol. These you could make up storys because we really didnt know the people or what was going on, so I made up some stories. One picture had a teacher grading papers on an overhead. So I wrote about how the teachers are beginning to see spots and that is due to looking into the light. All teachers have a 19% better chance of getting either cataracts or seeing neon speckles permanently with their constant viewing of the light. With this in mind, optometrists around the nation are saying the government should invest in schools learning/teaching braille.

So as you can see, I had some fun constructing my own little story and such. That was the just of it, I wrote some more and even made up a quote said by one of the teachers I named Marg Gaderglittendril (last name chosen due to the fact it popped into my mind during class. I swear, I have like mental terets...I dunno what made me think of that specific quote. Finding Nemo for those of you who do not know lol).

F4L was fun, we were able to use the cardio room again and I flippin LOVE that room. I forgot my CD player but that was okay. The good part of music for me is that I get lost in it soooooo easily. The bad part, I get lost in it soooooo easily...so when people wanna talk to me, Im kinda like torn from either listening to music or talking. I would put down my CD player anytime, but then it would be unnessary. Because then I would be talking and it wouldnt be in use. So pretty much, with the CD player on...Im whipped to it. But when I dont have it, I cant have it because i am too busy chatting it up. So i pretty much have to be alone with my music or enjoying some down time with friends that dont really mind im kinda spacey and not talking with music on. I burned a total of 55 calories on the tread, and i dunno how many on the stationary bikes. I didnt get the ones that count for me and I sure as hell dont know on my own. So Im gonna guess and say i burnt maybe 100 total. I was on the bikes for a while so yea, it was hardcore. I heart endorphins =D

Drama was neat, as is everyday. But each day is different so therefor, the neatness is reborn differently everday. I ran through lines with Manda, which is always fun. I still have trouble singing and acting motherly lol. It's a challenge Im working on beating. I also chatted with Meg inbetween scene running, she told us her awesome movie idea. I really dig it and i really hope it gets produced. I would love to see how it turns out. We did some improv but im a little shy about going on stage. There are all these other kids, which doesnt really bother me...but then there are the really good improvers...and i am afraid they are going to show me up on stage...in the "I got served" sort of way. They are all my friends but loaded with talent...and im afraid if i go on stage...i'll just fail. I hate how I get intimidated on things.

Lunch was fun but also kinda weird. Carly was sick and had to do homework...and Ward was just freakishly quite. Usually he has some witty comment to make or something I could call him a nerd for or something said...a sign of life...but he was just sitting there. I dig the weird, but this is weird weird. I miss the normal Ward, the one I made a snowman in summer with, the one I would make fun of for being a robotics club zelda nerd lovingly. It's like Ward in mirage form, he's not really there. Now there is no communication between us. Im not too much of a caller on the phoner, we dont really im much, and he doesnt seem to wanna hang out with me like we used to. Now he wont talk to me at lunch. I just see him now. 50 minutes of seeing. I guess I should be grateful, some people dont even get that much. I miss him tho. I think he should stop hiding in his own little world and come out to play. He was one of my best friends, now he's one of my best mirages. Sigh. I hope hes happy in that world of his.

Manda, Brittany and I goofed off the whole period. I read a few chapters of Catcher and the Rye and Manda wrote me a note that I couldnt read till after school. That wasnt fair lol im impacient. But I waited. Plus i had her write me a note I could read right then. I like notes. They make me happy. People should write me more notes, because then they would be making lots of happy. Pleeeease, I like notes =D It'd make my day!

Then English came around again, I havent been sleeping...SCORE! Partnered with Jamie, we talked about stuff. Mostly about the book. It was cool tho because it wasnt just a boring book discussion, it was a fun one.

US History, cool. Zeman is an awesome guy.

I got on the bus home and read the note. It was very nice and helped pep me up for driving. I had Annabell, my drivers ed teacher as my instructor. Let me start you off, she is amazingly awesome. I had so much fun in her class this summer, she has the best stories and enjoys laughing at me and my ways. I got in the car and it was just like getting in the car to drive with a friend. It was that casual. I wasnt up tight or nervous or anything. I even backed out of my driveway. Yep, my hell of a driveway with a flippin ditch on either side. As I was driving, she just talked to me. She asked me how school was going for me and what I did for the rest of my summer (she knew a lot about me from class because I would share alot of stories and current events with them lol). I drove a lot better and even if I did make a mistake, she didnt make a big deal of it besides pointing it out. I like having a teacher that can point out a mistake without making me feel completely inferior by making a big deal of it. It's hard enough admitting my mistakes so I really dont dig them being thrown out in front of me and ridiculed for them. But she just pointed it out and brought it to my attention...then went on with life.

I had to pick up some kids from LCHS. Dunno who they were but they were pretty cool. I like driving with cool kids, makes the ride more fun. We all told jokes and stories, it was great! I had to do a reverse around the corner, gosh...that was lame. I did alright on it and she taught us an easier way, but i need to keep practicing. Im not to fond of going reverse, im so not coordinated for that.

I didnt mind driving around with them but I had a football game to go to, so she dropped me off. She actually said they needed to drop me off before I said I needed to get home (I already drove) and I joked how they just wanted to get rid of me lol. But she said that if she could keep me the whole time or like shrink me and carry me around everyday, she would. That was nice. It made me feel real special. So I got home in even a greater mood.

Then I went to the football game. Tielke greeted me happily, it was nice to see a familiar face just as I get out of the car. Tielke rocks, she dealt with my insanities for a whole semester and somehow grew to love me. Props to the woman for dealing with me...oh yea and all the little kids lol. Aww..I miss David =(

I walked up the track and just as quickly, I found Brittany, Ariel, and Matt. It was funny because as soon as I get there, we walk right over to Grant's side instead lol. Then we walked back over to Antioch's side. I was hopin to see some Grant friends but it's not like i go to their games lol. We sat down and I watched Matt play and cheered him on. It helped I had his jersey on because then I could look down and know his number lol. He sacked two guys, I was really proud of him. I even cheered for him =) Brittany and I were commenting on the pants they have to wear. Haha tight pants.
"Matt, you have very healthy, meaty legs." -Brittany
She is quite a card lol. They beat Grant, yay!! Then varsity played. Matt found us and so did...hmm...thinking of his name...David? #44 lol. He couldnt play because he was broken. They found us and we hung out the rest the night. Brittany left us =( So we walked around during the middle of the game cuz it was getting really cramped in the stands. Damn people...

I started recognizing a lot of people I knew from Palombi. And I saw one of my best friends from PMS...Maggie Vnuk! Rock on!! Oh it was so happy! I miss her so so much! She is the friend that invited me to the Snowball camp this fall. She gives the tightest hugs ever, its nice. We nearly picked each other up while hugging, it was such a happy reunion. She said I looked so different and that I was so pretty. Hell, she's so pretty now herself. She was pretty before but she just keeps growing prettier. I think what I missed most about her was her laugh and smile, let alone hanging out with here. Lucky grant kids...damn schools splitting up...

I really enjoyed spending time with Matt tonight. While we were in the stands, we rearranged seating so he could sit by me =) That made me feel special =D Then I would 'yawn' and put my arm around him. And we would just have are arms around each other and it was really nice. Then we had to get up for some reason, and after we sat down again he 'yawned' and put his arm around me ::blushes:: Me gusta

Even when we were just walking around and stuff, I just I dunno. We were standing in line and he asked me if I wanted anything. That was really cute. I told him I had money too but he insisted. What a gentleman ;) It was sweet he offered even though I dont mind buying things myself. He got me a water though cuz I wanted one, so Ima gonna do the opposite of pick-pocket..which is like...slip-pocket? Haha I dunno.

And while we were standing around for a bit, we were measuring our hands to each others considering mine are freakishly small...and we like had our hands together, then he just sort of linked them and held mind. Then we stood there like that, holding hands and it was really really nice. I like holding hands with him.

The night was really crazy, Mike Pollit brought a Tymboli, this one girl kept talking about how her parents arent home and how shes gonna go home and get naked because she can (haha she is awesome lols), Maggie totally jumped on my back and I thought I was being ambushed lol, David or #44 was a total nympho haha(which is ok, I find myself thinking/speaking of sex and innuedos a lot sometimes too), Chani danced for us, met a lot of cool kids, saw a lot of friends, had a lot of fun with Matt =)

I really like talking to him. I like learning about him and just hearing what he has to say. So after we both got home, we talked more online. I say he's "coming up in roses" all over my mind =) He likes Elliot Smith and that song too. We dig a lot of the same music, and it's just really easy to talk to him. We plan to hang out this weekend =D Yaya

Haha I feel like a dork, he could be reading this. Well, Matt, you know most of this stuff anyway lol. :::blushes and hides:::

It's sleepytime. Therefor, I must sleep and sleep happily. Sleep happily I will. Goodnight moon.

Jenny at 7:29 PM

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her smiling eyes
this is your cue. smile.
Saturday, September 11, 2004 Friday was a really really good day. I woke up happy and went to school happy. Which is weird because usually it takes getting on the bus to get happy. That meaning seeing Manda, to help motivate me to go to school lol. Yet this morning, I woke up happy. I got to school and Matt gave me a rockin hug and his jersey. It was really big but what do you expect? There is usually padding and armor underneath (haha that made me think of knights). We talked for a while and laughed. I saw Courtney's hair and it's amazing lol. It made me think of Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite when he was saying the reason he was so hot was because of all his hair. So he decided to shave it off and it was just so random. And then Meg said that Courtney told her she didnt like her hair and Meg was like "want me to cut it?" and Courtney is just like YEA. And it all sounded just as random, it was great! Courtney is amazing, there are times i wish I had the guts she did. Haha she let us pet her hair lol. Yay! Then the bell rang and Matt gave me another hug and I was really happy =) Earth Science, Stafford had us doing tedious shit. And you know, it wouldnt really matter in the end if we REALLY NEEDED TO DO IT. But of course, we didnt. He decided at the very end that all of what we did was useless and we will do something better on monday that works. FUCK. You know, I had to hold a funnel with a filter with VERY dense dirt in it, and slowly keep pouring water in it to see how long it take to get 200ml of water through 40 ml or so of dense as all hell dirt. And I had to HOLD the funnel as I watched the water drip through ever so slowly or else it might affect the outcome. So the funnel had to be above the water, and I was holding it for 31.27 minutes. I SPENT A HALF HOUR OF MY LIFE WATCHING WATER DRIP THROUGH A FUNNEL SLOWLY FOR NO APPEARANT REASON! Not that I wasnt interested in the outcome, just the fact that he had us do all that and then tell us it wasnt necessary. If he just kept that part to himself, maybe it wouldnt be that bad. I coulda went on believing it was for the sake of learning, not for no flippin reason. Dammit. Oh well. Algebra I had a test. Funny, I was okay with that. I am usually spazzed out of my mind but I was in such a good mood, it was like a calming agent. I just had so many happy thoughts and feelings, it was like a shield to all the bad feelings and thoughts. I think I did alright on it. I really do understand it, the only problem is I cant explain how. So I hope I explained myself well enough. The teach likes that part. Ugh...theres a lot about me I cant explain. It just is. So when I figure out a problem or something, be content with that. Because I can't tell you what my mind does to get there or how it even starts. I dont really use my mind much, only my heart. So really...cant tell ya how this stuff comes about. I guess it's like the Big Bang, it's still a mystery. Yearbook was interesting. Dont really remember much besides...nope...nothin in my noggin. That class just goes. Oh, we had to practice writing captions again. It was pretty self explanitory so i decided to mix it up with my creative writing skills. Good or bad, I dont know. Entertaining, good. Completely factual, not necessarily lol. These you could make up storys because we really didnt know the people or what was going on, so I made up some stories. One picture had a teacher grading papers on an overhead. So I wrote about how the teachers are beginning to see spots and that is due to looking into the light. All teachers have a 19% better chance of getting either cataracts or seeing neon speckles permanently with their constant viewing of the light. With this in mind, optometrists around the nation are saying the government should invest in schools learning/teaching braille. So as you can see, I had some fun constructing my own little story and such. That was the just of it, I wrote some more and even made up a quote said by one of the teachers I named Marg Gaderglittendril (last name chosen due to the fact it popped into my mind during class. I swear, I have like mental terets...I dunno what made me think of that specific quote. Finding Nemo for those of you who do not know lol). F4L was fun, we were able to use the cardio room again and I flippin LOVE that room. I forgot my CD player but that was okay. The good part of music for me is that I get lost in it soooooo easily. The bad part, I get lost in it soooooo easily...so when people wanna talk to me, Im kinda like torn from either listening to music or talking. I would put down my CD player anytime, but then it would be unnessary. Because then I would be talking and it wouldnt be in use. So pretty much, with the CD player on...Im whipped to it. But when I dont have it, I cant have it because i am too busy chatting it up. So i pretty much have to be alone with my music or enjoying some down time with friends that dont really mind im kinda spacey and not talking with music on. I burned a total of 55 calories on the tread, and i dunno how many on the stationary bikes. I didnt get the ones that count for me and I sure as hell dont know on my own. So Im gonna guess and say i burnt maybe 100 total. I was on the bikes for a while so yea, it was hardcore. I heart endorphins =D Drama was neat, as is everyday. But each day is different so therefor, the neatness is reborn differently everday. I ran through lines with Manda, which is always fun. I still have trouble singing and acting motherly lol. It's a challenge Im working on beating. I also chatted with Meg inbetween scene running, she told us her awesome movie idea. I really dig it and i really hope it gets produced. I would love to see how it turns out. We did some improv but im a little shy about going on stage. There are all these other kids, which doesnt really bother me...but then there are the really good improvers...and i am afraid they are going to show me up on stage...in the "I got served" sort of way. They are all my friends but loaded with talent...and im afraid if i go on stage...i'll just fail. I hate how I get intimidated on things. Lunch was fun but also kinda weird. Carly was sick and had to do homework...and Ward was just freakishly quite. Usually he has some witty comment to make or something I could call him a nerd for or something said...a sign of life...but he was just sitting there. I dig the weird, but this is weird weird. I miss the normal Ward, the one I made a snowman in summer with, the one I would make fun of for being a robotics club zelda nerd lovingly. It's like Ward in mirage form, he's not really there. Now there is no communication between us. Im not too much of a caller on the phoner, we dont really im much, and he doesnt seem to wanna hang out with me like we used to. Now he wont talk to me at lunch. I just see him now. 50 minutes of seeing. I guess I should be grateful, some people dont even get that much. I miss him tho. I think he should stop hiding in his own little world and come out to play. He was one of my best friends, now he's one of my best mirages. Sigh. I hope hes happy in that world of his. Manda, Brittany and I goofed off the whole period. I read a few chapters of Catcher and the Rye and Manda wrote me a note that I couldnt read till after school. That wasnt fair lol im impacient. But I waited. Plus i had her write me a note I could read right then. I like notes. They make me happy. People should write me more notes, because then they would be making lots of happy. Pleeeease, I like notes =D It'd make my day! Then English came around again, I havent been sleeping...SCORE! Partnered with Jamie, we talked about stuff. Mostly about the book. It was cool tho because it wasnt just a boring book discussion, it was a fun one. US History, cool. Zeman is an awesome guy. I got on the bus home and read the note. It was very nice and helped pep me up for driving. I had Annabell, my drivers ed teacher as my instructor. Let me start you off, she is amazingly awesome. I had so much fun in her class this summer, she has the best stories and enjoys laughing at me and my ways. I got in the car and it was just like getting in the car to drive with a friend. It was that casual. I wasnt up tight or nervous or anything. I even backed out of my driveway. Yep, my hell of a driveway with a flippin ditch on either side. As I was driving, she just talked to me. She asked me how school was going for me and what I did for the rest of my summer (she knew a lot about me from class because I would share alot of stories and current events with them lol). I drove a lot better and even if I did make a mistake, she didnt make a big deal of it besides pointing it out. I like having a teacher that can point out a mistake without making me feel completely inferior by making a big deal of it. It's hard enough admitting my mistakes so I really dont dig them being thrown out in front of me and ridiculed for them. But she just pointed it out and brought it to my attention...then went on with life. I had to pick up some kids from LCHS. Dunno who they were but they were pretty cool. I like driving with cool kids, makes the ride more fun. We all told jokes and stories, it was great! I had to do a reverse around the corner, gosh...that was lame. I did alright on it and she taught us an easier way, but i need to keep practicing. Im not to fond of going reverse, im so not coordinated for that. I didnt mind driving around with them but I had a football game to go to, so she dropped me off. She actually said they needed to drop me off before I said I needed to get home (I already drove) and I joked how they just wanted to get rid of me lol. But she said that if she could keep me the whole time or like shrink me and carry me around everyday, she would. That was nice. It made me feel real special. So I got home in even a greater mood. Then I went to the football game. Tielke greeted me happily, it was nice to see a familiar face just as I get out of the car. Tielke rocks, she dealt with my insanities for a whole semester and somehow grew to love me. Props to the woman for dealing with me...oh yea and all the little kids lol. Aww..I miss David =( I walked up the track and just as quickly, I found Brittany, Ariel, and Matt. It was funny because as soon as I get there, we walk right over to Grant's side instead lol. Then we walked back over to Antioch's side. I was hopin to see some Grant friends but it's not like i go to their games lol. We sat down and I watched Matt play and cheered him on. It helped I had his jersey on because then I could look down and know his number lol. He sacked two guys, I was really proud of him. I even cheered for him =) Brittany and I were commenting on the pants they have to wear. Haha tight pants. "Matt, you have very healthy, meaty legs." -Brittany She is quite a card lol. They beat Grant, yay!! Then varsity played. Matt found us and so did...hmm...thinking of his name...David? #44 lol. He couldnt play because he was broken. They found us and we hung out the rest the night. Brittany left us =( So we walked around during the middle of the game cuz it was getting really cramped in the stands. Damn people... I started recognizing a lot of people I knew from Palombi. And I saw one of my best friends from PMS...Maggie Vnuk! Rock on!! Oh it was so happy! I miss her so so much! She is the friend that invited me to the Snowball camp this fall. She gives the tightest hugs ever, its nice. We nearly picked each other up while hugging, it was such a happy reunion. She said I looked so different and that I was so pretty. Hell, she's so pretty now herself. She was pretty before but she just keeps growing prettier. I think what I missed most about her was her laugh and smile, let alone hanging out with here. Lucky grant kids...damn schools splitting up... I really enjoyed spending time with Matt tonight. While we were in the stands, we rearranged seating so he could sit by me =) That made me feel special =D Then I would 'yawn' and put my arm around him. And we would just have are arms around each other and it was really nice. Then we had to get up for some reason, and after we sat down again he 'yawned' and put his arm around me ::blushes:: Me gusta Even when we were just walking around and stuff, I just I dunno. We were standing in line and he asked me if I wanted anything. That was really cute. I told him I had money too but he insisted. What a gentleman ;) It was sweet he offered even though I dont mind buying things myself. He got me a water though cuz I wanted one, so Ima gonna do the opposite of pick-pocket..which is like...slip-pocket? Haha I dunno. And while we were standing around for a bit, we were measuring our hands to each others considering mine are freakishly small...and we like had our hands together, then he just sort of linked them and held mind. Then we stood there like that, holding hands and it was really really nice. I like holding hands with him. The night was really crazy, Mike Pollit brought a Tymboli, this one girl kept talking about how her parents arent home and how shes gonna go home and get naked because she can (haha she is awesome lols), Maggie totally jumped on my back and I thought I was being ambushed lol, David or #44 was a total nympho haha(which is ok, I find myself thinking/speaking of sex and innuedos a lot sometimes too), Chani danced for us, met a lot of cool kids, saw a lot of friends, had a lot of fun with Matt =) I really like talking to him. I like learning about him and just hearing what he has to say. So after we both got home, we talked more online. I say he's "coming up in roses" all over my mind =) He likes Elliot Smith and that song too. We dig a lot of the same music, and it's just really easy to talk to him. We plan to hang out this weekend =D Yaya Haha I feel like a dork, he could be reading this. Well, Matt, you know most of this stuff anyway lol. :::blushes and hides::: It's sleepytime. Therefor, I must sleep and sleep happily. Sleep happily I will. Goodnight moon. Jenny at 7:29 PM Comments: Post a Comment
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