Her Smiling Eyes

Friday, December 03, 2004

Yesterday started that lovely time of month. You know...where it would make more sense if you were dying rather than just suffering for a week or so. And, because you are not dying...you kill everyone else with the help of a fucking chain saw while sipping some hot tea.

I usually don't get that bad. I am very blessed to get very mild cramps (if any at all), and have the ability to ignore it the best I can almost sucessfully.

Yesterday I was bitchy though. I just kept complaining. Today I was damn near ready to kill people with like a big laser gun and shit.

But it's all so very different when you are assigned fuck-heads as your teachers. I swear, if I had like a cantelope or something, I would have definately chucked it at Mr. Thompson's head. It's one thing to have to be controlled by adults and do things when they tell you, but it's another to have to actually listen to them...listen to the shit they have to say and comtemplate it. You have two choices: do as what your heart tells you because it makes the most sense by far. Or: do as the fuck-head says because you are a robot and have no other choices.

I'm not bashing the man, but he has to take into consideration what he is asking of me. I have one fucking weekend to try and find as many parties I can to fucking INVITE myself to in order to get the pictures for my deadline which is due next friday. Luckily, this weekend I am invited to a party. But he says I need to find a way to get invited to AT LEAST 4 more.

Me: "But Thompson, I am only invited to one party so far."
Thompson: "Well, you are just going to have to find more. Just find out when and where a party is and ask if you can come and take pictures of it."
My thoughts: Great idea, you crazy bastard. Great way to fucking make new friends. "Hey you, yea...I heard you were having a party. Can I come so I can take pictures of it? By the way, where do you live?"
Me: But I dont have a car to be driving to all these 'parties' I am supposed to find.
Thompson: Well, if you can't handle it, pick another topic.
My thoughts: FUCK YOU, I already made my fucking survey questions. Who knew you were gona be so fucking technical...
Me: I already made all my questions, I can't back out now. I didn't think you were going to be so technical. I am already going to a party that will have a variety of different people.
Thompson: No. You need a bigger variety. You need to go to at least 4 more parties. And you can't just have your friends in there.
Me: What, so I go to a complete stranger's house?
Thompson: Do whatever you need to do to get variety.

Now, I see where he is coming from. But I only have this weekend to find all these parties. And weekdays...come on now...

I told him he was God damn ridiculous.

Other than that, it was a fairly good day.

I aced my English test. That made me happy. I was one of the highest grades in the class. Happier. Went from a D to a C+. Estatic. I just might be cleaning up my act.

Earth Science is still unknown. He didnt tell us our grades on our test. Hope I did well.

Alge II is unknown as well. Again, I hope for the best.

I talked to Abby Churchill today in the library. It was very nice because I dont get the opprotunity to talk to her all too often. I enjoy talking to her (even when she dampers my dreams...lol). I'd definately go through spanish again just to share a class with her. I miss her in my schedule. But I shall see her Saturday. Yay =D

Meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow.

One of my best buddies is moving back from Connecticut very soon. I anticipate his return. It was very different these two years without him in my everyday life. It was definately different. I am different. I have changed. I am relatively the same around him, though. I hung out with him this summer and things were like old times. I've missed him. so much. Having him back in my life will be awesome, but different. I will have to get used to seeing him more often...but I will never take advantage of it. Once you have someone taken away from you...and then put back...you learn to appreciate their place in your life and the time you spend with them a lot more. Seeing him now will be like new. It could be a fresh start.

Maybe this time...he will like me too. But who am I to think such a thing? Stop it now, Jen, dont you dare get your fucking hopes up. You will just fall harder when you are let down. Just let things be. See what happens. stop. Stop. STOP. Do not think about it.

I need to call Julia. We are going to see the Incredibles and get tacos. I love how we can both live our own lives and still be really good friends. I dont wanna say the BF word because I dont know if she still considers me her best friend still. It's been more than 3 years of friendship, I sure hope so. Anyway, I still think of her as one of my best friends. Julia is just one of those people that you can be a little distant because of school and life and all...but yet still have that connection of friendship. We still have that bond and just understand each other. I am really grateful for having her in my life. I am really grateful she understands me so and just, it's just that really cool friendship that you always want. She is just one of those friends I know will always be there. Whether I talk to her everyday or not. Chyea.

I need $$$. Shit. I will have to pay in change. Heh heh, this will be amusing.

Good day to all. I love you.

Jenny at 4:46 PM

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her smiling eyes
this is your cue. smile.
Friday, December 03, 2004 Yesterday started that lovely time of month. You know...where it would make more sense if you were dying rather than just suffering for a week or so. And, because you are not dying...you kill everyone else with the help of a fucking chain saw while sipping some hot tea. I usually don't get that bad. I am very blessed to get very mild cramps (if any at all), and have the ability to ignore it the best I can almost sucessfully. Yesterday I was bitchy though. I just kept complaining. Today I was damn near ready to kill people with like a big laser gun and shit. But it's all so very different when you are assigned fuck-heads as your teachers. I swear, if I had like a cantelope or something, I would have definately chucked it at Mr. Thompson's head. It's one thing to have to be controlled by adults and do things when they tell you, but it's another to have to actually listen to them...listen to the shit they have to say and comtemplate it. You have two choices: do as what your heart tells you because it makes the most sense by far. Or: do as the fuck-head says because you are a robot and have no other choices. I'm not bashing the man, but he has to take into consideration what he is asking of me. I have one fucking weekend to try and find as many parties I can to fucking INVITE myself to in order to get the pictures for my deadline which is due next friday. Luckily, this weekend I am invited to a party. But he says I need to find a way to get invited to AT LEAST 4 more. Me: "But Thompson, I am only invited to one party so far." Thompson: "Well, you are just going to have to find more. Just find out when and where a party is and ask if you can come and take pictures of it." My thoughts: Great idea, you crazy bastard. Great way to fucking make new friends. "Hey you, yea...I heard you were having a party. Can I come so I can take pictures of it? By the way, where do you live?" Me: But I dont have a car to be driving to all these 'parties' I am supposed to find. Thompson: Well, if you can't handle it, pick another topic. My thoughts: FUCK YOU, I already made my fucking survey questions. Who knew you were gona be so fucking technical... Me: I already made all my questions, I can't back out now. I didn't think you were going to be so technical. I am already going to a party that will have a variety of different people. Thompson: No. You need a bigger variety. You need to go to at least 4 more parties. And you can't just have your friends in there. Me: What, so I go to a complete stranger's house? Thompson: Do whatever you need to do to get variety. Now, I see where he is coming from. But I only have this weekend to find all these parties. And weekdays...come on now... I told him he was God damn ridiculous. Other than that, it was a fairly good day. I aced my English test. That made me happy. I was one of the highest grades in the class. Happier. Went from a D to a C+. Estatic. I just might be cleaning up my act. Earth Science is still unknown. He didnt tell us our grades on our test. Hope I did well. Alge II is unknown as well. Again, I hope for the best. I talked to Abby Churchill today in the library. It was very nice because I dont get the opprotunity to talk to her all too often. I enjoy talking to her (even when she dampers my dreams...lol). I'd definately go through spanish again just to share a class with her. I miss her in my schedule. But I shall see her Saturday. Yay =D Meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow. One of my best buddies is moving back from Connecticut very soon. I anticipate his return. It was very different these two years without him in my everyday life. It was definately different. I am different. I have changed. I am relatively the same around him, though. I hung out with him this summer and things were like old times. I've missed him. so much. Having him back in my life will be awesome, but different. I will have to get used to seeing him more often...but I will never take advantage of it. Once you have someone taken away from you...and then put back...you learn to appreciate their place in your life and the time you spend with them a lot more. Seeing him now will be like new. It could be a fresh start. Maybe this time...he will like me too. But who am I to think such a thing? Stop it now, Jen, dont you dare get your fucking hopes up. You will just fall harder when you are let down. Just let things be. See what happens. stop. Stop. STOP. Do not think about it. I need to call Julia. We are going to see the Incredibles and get tacos. I love how we can both live our own lives and still be really good friends. I dont wanna say the BF word because I dont know if she still considers me her best friend still. It's been more than 3 years of friendship, I sure hope so. Anyway, I still think of her as one of my best friends. Julia is just one of those people that you can be a little distant because of school and life and all...but yet still have that connection of friendship. We still have that bond and just understand each other. I am really grateful for having her in my life. I am really grateful she understands me so and just, it's just that really cool friendship that you always want. She is just one of those friends I know will always be there. Whether I talk to her everyday or not. Chyea. I need $$$. Shit. I will have to pay in change. Heh heh, this will be amusing. Good day to all. I love you. Jenny at 4:46 PM Comments: Post a Comment
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